Afternoon Tea: Eat Until the Marginal Utility Is Zero

A proper English afternoon tea is something that refined people take in an elegant atmosphere. I have been told by several people that it is not the same thing as "high tea", which the plebian middle classes take much later in the afternoon/evening in their attempts to emulate the aristocracy.



Last year when I was in England, MA urged me to take afternoon tea "at some tony place" like the Ritz or The Savoy. I balked because I had so many things I wanted to do, and I never got around to doing the tea adventure.



This year, it occurred to me that I should try to follow his advice which has generally been very good and useful. Alas, it was too late for me to book a reservation at the Ritz or The Savoy. Never fear, though, there are plenty of elegant environments in the Mayfair district and environs of London where one can take afternoon tea.



To begin, I solicited advice from many people in this area. Every single one of them who had considerable experience agreed that both the Ritz and The Savoy no longer had "it", that they were trading on their reputations. There was strong support for Claridge's, some mild support for Brown's, and a smattering of mentions of Harrod's or Fortnum and Mason's. They all also agreed that it is inadvisable to eat anything after breakfast before tea, because while it may not look like a lot of food, it can be very filling if the place keeps bringing you more as you finish each lot.



I followed up this lively discussion with a search of the internet for information, advice, and reviews. I had never had afternoon tea before. Hell, I thought "clotted cream" meant cream that had gone bad and had curdled (it doesn't mean that at all. It refers to Devon cream), and so I had avoided it like the plague, wondering why anyone in their right minds would ever want to eat it on scones (which are a bit like over-sized baking-powder biscuits, when you get right down to it).



I was told that one is expected to wear a coat and tie to afternoon tea, which poses no problem for me since that is often how I dress when I teach. But it turns out that many/most establishments now have a "smart casual" dress code that means anything other than muddy work boots seems to be acceptable, more's the pity.



Here are some of the links to reviews and write-ups about afternoon tea here, here, and here, for those who might be interested.



Because I started so late to try to get reservations, the more popular places didn't have a table available at a convenient time the very next day. At the same time, at least one of the reviews said that The Four Seasons was an excellent place to begin if you haven't taken afternoon tea before at one of these tony types of places. So I had my afternoon-tea deflowering at The Lounge in The Four Seasons a few days ago (and, appropriately, began with Jasmine tea).



Here is an edited version of what I wrote to Ms. Eclectic after the experience:

Tea at the Four Seasons was very nice. The menu was exactly as described on the internet, and I ordered the spring champagne tea because I liked the sounds of those sandwiches better than the ones served for the traditional afternoon tea.



I started with champagne and then had jasmine tea. The hostess/server was very attentive, but in a tasteful and discreet way; she didn't hover, but she kept her eye on me to make sure everything was okay. Early on, while I was drinking my champagne, she asked if I would like a newspaper or magazine, and when I said I thought that might be nice, she quite appropriately guessed that The Telegraph would suit me. [see Tuesday's posting for a description]



After she had served me the tea, she brought a sort of silver tree-like thing, almost two-feet tall, that had clotted cream and jam on a plate at the bottom, sandwiches in the middle, and scones (warm and covered) on the top. I ate the five little sandwiches first (even the one with crab, the one with smoked salmon, and the one with olives, things I'm not usually very keen on, being more of a burger or peanut-butter-and-jam kind of guy) and before I could start on the scones, the server asked whether I would like more sandwiches, so I had another round of those. The crab sandwiches were in little puff thingies, and the smoked salmon were on mini-croissants, and there was a delicious chicken sandwich and something else with lots of mushrooms. The bread was thin, and the crusts had been removed, as I had been told is an absolute necessity at a proper English tea. The server explained them all to me, but I've forgotten what they were.



Then I had the scones: one with raisins (called a "fruit scone" by many people) and one plain. The "clotted" cream is very spreadable and the strawberry-rhubarb jam was good. When I had finished those, they brought out two more, which I couldn't finish.



All the time, the server kept pouring the tea for me. She was very good — not overbearing, but on the ball. The tea began to taste a bit bitter near the end of the pot, so when she asked if she could bring me another pot, I asked for their anniversary blend, which was really nice. If you ever go there, I recommend trying it.



Then she brought out little desserts. I was allowed to choose three of the five. I had a tiny almond cream-filled puff with something that seemed like hardened caramelized sugar on top, a fabulous strawberry and cream tart, and some horrid ginger and raspberry torte, which was the only thing I found totally inedible during the entire tea. It was all finished off with a beige-coloured champagne truffle on a strawberry slice, all on a large spoon. I had no idea how to eat it, so I just shoved the whole thing into my mouth.



The entire experience/adventure took me over an hour and a half, and I could gladly have taken longer and stretched it out more, but I had to leave to catch my ride back to the castle.



I'm glad I did it, but I am not so sure I want to do a whole lot more of these (just for comparison's sake). I had a reservation for one at Brown's this Friday after my class's field trip to London (for a seminar on congestion pricing), and one at Claridge's for the following Tuesday. I have canceled the one at Brown's and go to Devonshire directly on the weekend and sample an afternoon tea at some "tony place" there in the own of Bath (the Royal Crescent for sure, and perhaps the Pump House — recommendations are eagrely solicited).



While I was at The Four Seasons, I absolutely loved the experience and thought "Wow! This is something I could get used to if I had the money." but when I had returned to the castle and was suffering from having over-eaten, I knew I would not be able to do this on a regular basis, at least not if I ate everything I could.

In our introductory economics courses, we often make the point that at all-you-can-eat buffets, people tend to keep eating so long as their expected marginal utility is positive (i.e. up to the point at which it becomes zero). I think I did that at the Four Seasons, but ex postI might have gone past the zero point [of course I did not go through the zero point on an expected utility basis; I am, after all, a rational maximizer].



More later if I get a chance, describing some comparison experiences.

Comments

[Joshua]

The soi-disant doyen of British food critics, movie producer Michael Winner, has suggested that The Mount Nelson Hotel in Cape Town serves the best afternoon tea in the world. See here:

http://tinyurl.com/26kh7e

[Joshua]

'I have been told by several people that it is not the same thing as "high tea", which the plebian middle classes take much later in the afternoon/evening in their attempts to emulate the aristocracy.'

Oy vey.

[Tim Worstall]

The Royal Crescent might be like that but the Pump Rooms won't.
At the latter your best bet would be a Bath Bun.

It's also true that Bath is in Somerset, not Devon (there are some who will claim Avon, but that's a modern nonsense).

Finally, just to cement my reputation for pedantry, clotted cream is cream that has been baked to remove some of the water. It's a method of preservation and you have been able to, traditionally, order it by post.

[Alan]

Cream tea is one of the great glories of the world. I loved your discussion of clotted cream - the most disgusting name for the most sublime experience.

[Joshua]

1) Clotted cream

"Both Devon and Cornwall - counties in the South West of England - are famous for their thick cream, which is mainly produced on farms, and in small dairies.

The most famous of all is 'Clotted Cream' which achieves its thick clotted texture by heating cream of high-fat breed cows, such as the Jersey type, in pans, traditionally made of copper but latterly stainless steel, to about 190°f and allowing it to cool slowly. In the farmhouses, the pans were heated crudely over a fire or stove and the cream was rich in acid and aroma-producing bacteria. Dairy or factory methods were much better controlled, using steam heated pans. The cream is usually packed in shallow trays a few inches deep and forms a yellow crusty surface. The consistency is thick and heavy, almost like treacle, and is traditionally served by scooping the cream out into cups or small cartons."

http://www.britishdelights.com/cream.htm

2) Best afternoon tea in Bath?

Ston Easton Park

Near Bath, Somerset, BA3 4DF

"Ston Easton Park is a Grade I listed palladian mansion, built in 1740 and set in parkland created by the 18th century landscape gardener Humphrey Repton. This country house has exquisite furnishing and paintings decorating the fine public rooms where guests can enjoy Afternoon Tea. Ston Easton Park was awarded 'Best Tea' for 2000 by Michael Winner in the The Sunday Times"

http://tinyurl.com/2ts2gl