Baseball and Bedeling

I am the Esquire Bedel for The University of Western Ontario. That means I carry the ceremonial mace for many events, mostly convocations*, walking in front of the Chancellor, replicating the old role from centuries ago when an Esquire Bedel walked in front of a dignitary, carrying a seriously real mace to clear the rabble from the way and to protect the dignitary.**

My next Bedeling performance will be in late October for the installations of the university's new Chancellor and new President. Yesterday we had a meeting to go over the ceremony, step-by-step; it will be slightly different from the standard convocation ceremonies.

I was discussing the new procedures with a friend with whom I've done some baseball sportscasting, and that led to a fun exchange that he started, incorporating paraphrases from common sayings by various baseball broadcasters. Here's what we came up with (additions and amendments welcome):

The ceremony calls for me to stand down on the floor in front of the stage facing the audience, holding the mace, for what will likely be at least 20- 25 minutes. Presumably as Bedel-with-mace, I'm standing there as a symbol of Bedels-gone-by, guarding the Acting Chancellor and the Chancellor-Elect.

 

["He stood there like a house on the side of the road (as the change-up passed him by )"]. 

 

Then I have a slow walk across in front of the audience, up the side stairs, and across the stage

[and so he slowly drug hisself back to the dugout] 

 

where I present the mace to the new Chancellor, who promptly hands it back

[in the dugout we see him talking about bats with the batting coach. The coach says there's nothing wrong with the bat he's using; he just needs to adjust his grip on it.] 

 

and then the Chancellor asks the Bedel to place the mace  in its proper place (nice rhyme)

[Just go put your bat back in the bat rack and take a seat on the bench, old-timer].

 

 

 

Former President, Paul Davenport, was also a huge baseball fan, and we had a great time just before a convocation over a decade ago, pretending the mace was a baseball bat. Paul claimed he struck me out.

 

*The University of Western Ontario holds about 25 different convocation ceremonies each year to accommodate the growing enrollments at the university. The events are seen as very special by the students, parents, and grandparents.

 

**The closest I've had to come to protecting dignitaries was one time when I nearly had to elbow photo-taking parent out of the way; nearly because I thrust my elbow outward and he backed out of the aisle. Other times I was concerned involved a chancellor and a convo speaker who were both far from popular.